Sofia’s Wisdom: 2014 Year End Insights (Freewrite)

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friends, Gratitude, inner strength, life's challlenges, perserverance, running, Sofia's Wisdom, support, survival, unemployment

Image: maf04

2014 has been, overall, a very difficult year for me. I can’t say I’m sad to see it end. However, even in the bad times which included recovery from toe surgery that pretty much tanked my running abilities, high job stress that did indeed result in being laid off & unemployed for 5 months and sadness realizing who wasn’t there & didn’t have my back after so many years of having their’s…I’ve also seen and done some great things.

I’ve completed 9 races (no medal for Moffitt) which tells me just how much I can take to see things through to a finish. I can say I have a crown 😃. I got to participate in 3 inaugural races. One of which I overcame my fear of heights and ran over one of the highest bridges. Another had me not give up for 12 hours to achieve @29 miles and finishing an Ultra. I made it to Key West finally & ran the 5k bandaged toe in hiking sandals and discovered I love Bloody Marys and KW sunsets. I thankfully had enough banked frequent flyer and Hilton points to be able to go home to see family, my niece’s wedding and some high school friends who I hadn’t seen since graduating in 1987! I got to see Annapolis after 14 yrs. I still love that place. And at the eleventh hour I witnessed so many things come together that resulted in me accepting a job right before Christmas! So even in the darkness, the light shines through and I keep going on my “race course” of life knowing I am a strong “muther f*cker” and that can’t be taken away from me! Thanks everyone who’s been there this 2014 when I reached out for help. Many of you know that it’s not easy for me to do. 😍

Sofia- Wisdom of the Ages blog and project will continue in 2015. Giving my new employment position, I may have to re-structure my posts and frequency. So have patience with me as I figure this out. I can feel that this is going to be a great year! Heres to an amazing, happy, healthy and prosperous 2015!!

Gratitude Not Attitude: Better Late than Never

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fears, Gratitude, gratitude not attitude, running, self-improvement, unemployment, WIA grants

I seem to be spiraling these past few weeks as a result of traveling. One week, fly to RI for a family event and some video-recording of interview subjects, come home for a week to almost get centered again, only to get back on a plane to go crazily run over a bridge with 20,000 strangers. I’ve been happy to be home this week to try and get back on track. However, family has been here to visit my mom…oh and me. Have I got much done? Not really. At least not to the level of my internal success indicators.

Therefore, I have felt pressed and inefficient. Now who likes to feel that way? Not me! This week has also resulted in some deep thinking and mentally playing out several scenarios as to whether I should proceed with a strong job lead or not. The need for scenario playing is that the job is in Columbia, SC doing what I was doing here in FL before I was laid off. Actually, it’s the SC version of my former company. That leads to a whole bunch of other concerns, back and forths and a major factor that they won’t provide relocation monies to boot. Maybe you can now commiserate as to my stress levels, headaches and feelings of spiraling. But yet, as always, there are moments this week that I am grateful for as I trudge along this thing we call life.

1. I faced my fear of heights and strong dislike of cold windy weather and completed my 10k race over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. It was surprisingly warm and calm 185 feet up on that bridge come race day.
2. The views and pictures I took during the race and the time to enjoy all this were some of the best decisions I’ve made in a long time. I usually do a race to get it done as quick as my turtle self can do it. This time I switched to the goal of stopping to enjoy and take pictures. I ended up still getting the race done in the time I thought it would take without planning to stop or take my time! I will most likely never do this race again. However, I have some great memories and pictures to prove it. Here’s some proof!

3. I’m about to start my class prep work for PMP certification. I’m grateful that I was able to organize others students to petition the school to start this class now vs. their plan to hold until sometime in January. When you’re unemployed, time is of the essence. The school finally saw this and agreed. Now starts the fun torture and not having enough hours in the day. Yeah, let’s get this party started!
4. I am reminded to be grateful that I received the WIA grant money I got for the MS Project and PMP classes. I was upset that my other classmates are getting more funds than me because they live in a more populated FL county. Unlike my county, these students are being begged to take more course work. When I inquired if I could somehow get more funds, I was informed my county was almost out of money. By grace, I applied when I did (the start of the new fiscal year in August) and was able to get the money I got. I was very lucky!
5. I am grateful for my home. I missed it, my bed, my mom, my furry babies, my views around it. I’ve decided that in the end I enjoy it too much to leave it. This fact did play a large role in my decision to not proceed further with the job opportunity in SC. Tampa Bay Florida you seem to be stuck with me for the time being.

Gratitude Not Attitude: De Ja Vue

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Annapolis, bridges, friends, Gratitude, running, travel

It’s another Friday traveling to another state. Not a wedding but to run across one of the highest bridges in the United States, the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. I’m afraid of heights so the plan is to stick to the median on my way over the bridge. Oh…and to not look down…great!

My Five Things I’m Grateful For This Week:

1. I actually got a request to do a first round interview for a job in my actual field. It’s taken 3 months but I got one.
2. I was able to at least get one video of three up loaded AND edited before the schedule went crazy.
3. I get to see a friend this weekend that I have not seen in several months since she moved.
4. I get to have real Maryland crab cakes this weekend and see one of my favorite towns, Annapolis. It’s been over 18 years since I’ve last been here.
5. Due to all my travel for work (when I had my last job) – I didn’t have to pay for my plane ticket or hotel room. I even got a bonus free upgrade on my rental car. SWEET!

So even though I’m freezing right now, it’s been a good week. I hope everyone had a good week, themselves. Here’s to the weekend! May I survive my race over the bridge Sunday…fingers crossed. 😉

Gratitude Not Attitude After a Having a Bad Week

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Gratitude, hope

This week has been a challenging week for me. The combination of being sick, the negative effects of unemployment getting to rear their ugly head in my life and dealing with a delay in my schooling that’s supposed to assist my trying to find a job, have all left me feeling grim and hopeless at times. You’ll all have to forgive me if I’ve been a little absent and distracted this week.

However, ever being the one to try to find something positive to hold on to in addition to things like a roof over my head, food, water, clothing and shelter…which are little things, I know. I am very grateful I have them but feeling guilty I can’t pay my fair share for them presenlty. Yet I needed to find other things to be grateful for this week to remind myself of the good that can still appear, however small, when it feels the world is more out to squash you down than lift you up. So here are this week’s five:

1. My niece is getting married this week end and I’m happy that she has found the ability to trust that she would find love, believe in love and know that she is very worthy of being loved.

2. While I had a job, I did a lot of travel for it. As a result, I had enough points to pay for my flight back home.

3. I’m happy that I get to stay with my sister while I’m back home and that I get to spend time catching up with my family.

4. I finally met my goal to write the post on attending the Quality of Life Forum two weeks ago in spite of the fact that they still haven’t posted the presenters’ PowerPoints like they said they would.

5. I accurately packed all I needed to pack for my trip and both pieces of luggage made it to my destination.

Here’s to betters days and a better week. Every new day is a chance for something good if not great to happen. I try to hold onto this.